15 Garden Jokes

Sometimes lessons plans don’t go the way they were planned, and by sometimes, I mean every time. The best thing I have learned to use in those crucial seconds that determine whether you keep the kids attention or you lose them for the next twenty minutes, is a classic vegetable joke. Sometimes those classroom management tricks work and we all know at least one, but sometimes they don’t. In my experience however, if you stand in a room with kids and say “do you wanna hear a joke?” you have caught their attention. Here are some of the best corny veggie jokes I have come across (pun intended)

Why did the tomato blush?
Because he saw the salad dressing!

Why did the carrot blush?
Because he saw the chic pea!

When do you know a banana wants to dance?
When you see a banana shake!

Why do fungi have to pay double bus fares?
Because they take up too mushroom!

Which is the fastest vegetable?
A runner bean!

What is a zucchini’s favorite sport?
Squash!

What do you do if you loose your root vegetables?
Home it will turnip

Why did the potatoes argue?
They couldn’t see eye to eye

What did the lettuce say to the celery?
Quit stalking me

What is green and goes to summer camp?
A brussel scout!

What is the strongest vegetable?
A muscle sprout!

Why did the grape go out with a prune?
He couldn’t find a date!

What did the sweet potato say to the pumpkin?
I yam what I yam

Which vegetable is a sailor’s least favorite?
Which vegetable did Noah leave off the ark?
Leeks!

Which vegetable loves animals the most?
A zoo-cchini!